A Garden of Ideas

to ponder and share

Loving Someone Means Being Present

I learned this from my beautiful sister who passed away from breast cancer (and the horrific so-called treatment) because when you’re facing death at an early age, things get distilled down to the bare bones.

Sometimes when someone is sick or having a rough time for other reasons their family and friends stay away from the person because they feel like, “I don’t know what to say to make the person feel better.” Well, you don’t have to say anything. Just sit in a chair nearby and be with that person. Maybe that friend or family member isn’t in a chatty mood and merely wants your company or just to look over and see that someone is physically there for them if needed. Maybe you bring her a glass of cool water. Anything. Something. Just be there. You never know how much good you can do.

My mother used to relate to us that one of my grand uncles, a man loved by everyone who knew him, would sit with her at the hospital and just hold her hand when she was there for days agonizing over how my brother would fare from his bicycle accident. A man of few words, but he was more like a guardian angel.

So whether it’s a mom, or dad, sister or brother, cousin or friend. Just be there. If you live far away, call them even if you don’t know what to say.

Thank you!

Karen J.